Meet Jacob

Jacob ... meet your next victim.

Seriously - an amazing machine even if it is the machine from HELL ... and one that, without a shadow of a doubt, intimidates me the most in the entire gym. I think the only reason I put my brave girl panties on was because it was 12:20 am (yes ... A.M.) and there were only three other people in the gym with me. I had the entire cardio section to myself which was actually kinda eery. There is always so much movement in there - machines humming, people talking, sweat flying - that to see it so still just didn't seem right

BUT

because of that eery, unnatural silence,

i did

JACOB'S LADDER!!!

If you don't know what Jacob's ladder is, it is a machine that looks somewhat effortless but it is really quite a workout. My heart was racing. I could feel the sweat starting to bead towards the end. My legs were on fire. It works you harded than you expect, faster than you expect. It was great.

Truth be told, I didn't last more than two minutes on it and I had to have a 20ish second break around the 1min 19sec mark but that is okay ... right? I mean .. I conquered my second fear that night and gave it a shot. That is what matters so I will allow myself a pat on the back with a mental 'yay me' if you will. (btw ... my first fear was that the belt wouldnt fit. it did. phew!)

To see what Jacob's Ladder is, watch the video below. Even if you already know what it is/how it works, watch it and see a few variations they do to focus on glutes and abs. Maybe it'll add something new to your next workout!

Oops.  THIS is the video that shows a few different moves to work different body parts.  Sorry about that. 

Bad fatty, fat, fat

It's been a trying-ish several days.  Thursday night I started up with a bladder infection.  blech!  By mid morning Friday it was unbearable ... inside and out.  I was supposed to hang out and crash and Stéphanie's house but opted to come home where I could find more comfort in my own bed with my own pillows.  I have to admit ... it did help but the thought of moving around and breaking out in a sweat didn't appease the discomfort I had left.  Needless to say, it was a low key Saturday followed by Thanksgiving Sunday and Monday where in it seems that I have a new problem ... digesting fats.

My Mom bought a Butterball turkey and, in all seriousness, steer clear of them if you can.  The grease that sat on top of the gravy was nothing less that gross.  A big suprise to me since Butterball is always advertised as being the bird of choice.  Even to stir it whisk it before stirring didn't completely mix it in with the rest of the liquid.  After my meal - in which I neither over ate or went back for seconds - things just weren't right.  On Monday I had a plate of leftovers, smothered in gravy.  I would say 3x the amount of gravy I had on Sunday.  Ouph.  A lead ball in my stomach and other digestive issues.  I felt awful!  It still didn't click as to what it could be ... until the movies on Tuesday.   I had a small popcorn and asked for butter in the middle (the real stuff .. not Becel) and they over did it.  Now you have to understand that I really do like buttery popcorn.  i LOVE buttery popcorn actually but even I have my limits.  That being said ... it wasnt at the point of being unedible so I nibbled away as we watched out flick.  Double ouph.  Here came the digestive issues again.  NOT FUN. 

And that is when I realized it ... the fats are not agreeing with me.  All in all, that is not a bad thing.  It just shows me how working out and changed eating habits (albiet not the best changes but good changed none the less) have affected my body.  Once able to stomach these foods, I am no longer able to.  It's like my body was screaming at me "STOP EATING THIS SH!T" and quickly trying to get the toxins out. 

Lesson leaned.

Next movie ... frozen yogurt!

Whoa what a trip

Last night, Tanya and I ventured to the gym for a workout ... in the co-ed gym.  Yup!  I took the plunge, put my big girl panties on (literally) and faced my fears.  I worked out amongst the buff and tough fellas and it wasn't so bad.  They weren't gawking at my oversized self or snickering as I attempted to try new machines and free weight contraptions.  They just went about their business with the occassional look and some even offered to help when we looked really stumped. 

My intentions were to do my regular workout however, that quickly changed when I saw the equipment that was up there.  It is so different than what is in the woman's only section and overwhelming.  I walked around for a bit trying to find the machines that looked like the ones I was familliar with alas ... no luck.  That is when I really decided to throw caution to the wind and just go for it.  Tanya and I started at one corner of the gym and just worked our around trying this, that and the other.  Some things I liked others ... not so much.  What new things did I try, you wonder? 

• I used a contraption to do my squats.  It stabalizes your feet and lets your calves lean against something ... much preferred doing them this way.  I just have to work on my posture a bit more.  Using the ball really helped that.
• I did a leg press thing which had me in a reclined position and my legs almost 90 degrees in the air, pushing the weights up and down with my legs.  140lbs.  Not bad (or so I think)
• Ab crunch.  OW. OW. OW. OW.  Then again ... maybe it wouldnt have hurt so much if I didn't have it set to 90 lbs.  Ah well ... at least I did it. 
• Dip Assist.  WTF?  Won't be going near this contraption for at least another 25 lbs.
• Glute Press whojamajig - Looks like I did it right but I'm not sure.  I just know that I didn't feel it in my behind like I thought I would have.

So, that was my day.  A two hour workout with about 1.5 hours of actual working out.  (I figure a half an hour of figuring stuff out seems fair. haha).  I am hoping that the next time Katie comes to my swankified gym, we can do a workout up there so she can show me what is what.  lol

In the meantime, I continue to NOT lose weight.  Argh.  Eating is still not a hundred percent but it is soooo much better.  Becoming VERY, VERY frustrated with this.  I mean, it can't be muscles buidling that is keeping me here so what is it?  All I have to is stay focused because it is moments like these that make me want to stop what I am doing ... but I wont.  I will persevere ... it just may take some time. 

See this ...

well

I   D I D   I T !!!

Seriously ... the idea of doing this scared the bejesus out of me.  I would watch in awe as all of these physically fit, toned, muscular women worked their abs.  Never in my wildest dreams did I think I would be able to do it at this point.  Some day ... a long ways away ... but not today yesterday at this weight and size.  But I did.  2 reps of 12 and one rep of 10 to be exact (killer on the lower back ... where I have issues due to past injuries so I need to be careful).  I even did the last 95% hugging a 10 pound weight to my chest. 

Wait ... there's more.  Yup.  You read right.  I tried two more things that I have always been afraid of:

this

and this

Granted I was only able to get up as far as the model (1/2 way) and I was only able to do 6 of them because my breasts were falling out of my bra and risked chin injury if I continuted but at the end of the day, for me, it isnt necessarily that I tried something new.  For me, with these three pieces of equipment, it is that I challenged myself to try three things that scared the living crap out of me.  Who knew it was in my grasp?  Not me ... but Tanya did.  When I asked her to show me how it was done to make sure I was doing it right, she encouraged me right along and away I went.  I love trying new things.  What a FABULOUS feeling.

So ... that is a total of FOUR new things for me this week.  The above equipment and an Anti-Gravity Restorative Yoga class which i LOVED and will be sure to take again.  Maybe twice a month.  What a great stretch and unlike a regular yoga class.

I didn't think I was going to make it back to the big city again until the weekend but it looks like I may have time to slip in for a quick workout tomorrow afterall.  After a week of 'news,' I am feeling a tad brave, I have to admit.  Tomorrow I think I am going to go and work in the *gasp* CO-ED gym.  The equipment there is so much better and more to chose from.

A New Goal

Through Facebook and via Daily Mile, I have been watching the fitness activity of some of my friends ... and a few scrapbooking artists that I enjoy but do not know personally.  Not only do they inspire me creatively but athletically also.  There are a few that stand out to me right now for various reasons (and whom I will mention in a bit) but right now one in particular is Cathy Zielske.  While I only 'know' her through the industry, as well as reading the encouraging comments she writes on Katie's Daily Mile posts, I find myself excited for her achievements and/or when she reaches a goal.  One thing that Cathy's Daily Mile feeds have me really wanting to do is bike.  I haven't ridden a bike outside since I was in  my early  double digits and I have only ridden a stationary bike once since then.  Actually.  That isnt true.  I have done a couple of stints of 10 minutes or 5kms but nothing significant until last week when I biked for 12 kms.  It was tough.  It was a struggle.  But I did it.  My rump was sore then numb and my legs hurt ... but it felt great.  Throughout it all, I realized that biking is something that I could really come to enjoy and love.  Not so much the stationary, indoor kind but the outdoor, breeze-in-my-face kind.  Cathy's DM feeds inspired me to get on the bike in the first place which has led to this - my new goal ...

Next spring/summer/fall, I want to go on bike trips.  I want to start on half day ones then full day ones.  I would LOVE for the final bike trip of the season to be a weekend one.  My Dad was supposed to bike from Ottawa to Kingston, spend the night, then bike back.  That sounds WONDERFUL.  Exciting.  So much more fun than running (although I still would like to do that too ... just not at this weight and size).

... the first part of my goal was set in to motion today.  I ordered my self a pair of padded bike shorts.  That has to be good for something.  Secondly, I did a google search and found that there are a ton ... and I mean A TON ... of trails in the area to ride on.  This actually made me excited with anticipation ... literally.  Slightly excellerated heart rate feeling, fun in my tummy, happy in my head excited.  I really do live in between two beautiful communities ... I should really take advantage of it.

I am not 100% sure how to start training for this goal.  I will have to do some research on that.  All I know is that it is going to have to start on the recumbant bikes at the gym because there is no way my plus sized lady parts can handle the spinner bikes.  With the information I have, I know I can do 12kms on the fat burning setting so I will try to repeat that goal until I have more information.  As soon as I get my protective gear I will move over to the spinnng bikes.  Once I can do an hour on the spinning bike, I will move up to Spinning classes.  There is one in particular that I am dying to try - Soul Cycle.  It involves a dark atmosphere lit by candles, great music and a cathartic setting.  How can I resist?  Once spring hits, I will start biking to work (which translates to getting my butt out of bed early.  this will be interesting.  HA!)  It's a short 15 km, relative flat road trip but I will only do this while the weather is cool as there is no way I would survive the work day after a sweaty ride in.  Ew!  From there I will incorporate trips that gradual increase in distance thus preparing me for a long trip in the fall.  Sound do-able?  In my head it does.  Now I just need to make it my reality. 

I really hope I can do this.  Anyone want to join?

In other friendly news ... I am going to quickly send a shout a few of my awesome friends:

• I've mentioned Katie before.  An absolute inspiration who began her journey a year an a half ago.  Her first goal was to run 5km .. and she did it.  One year later ... otherwise known as last week ... Katie and her husband ran their very first half marathon.  INCREDIBLE.  So very proud of her accomplishments (not to mention how amazing she looks - wowza).

This is Katie and Ryan one year ago,

after improving her health and training to run her first 5k since university

This is Katie & Ryan one week ago, after surpassing their 5k and 10k goals,

to run their first half marathon.  A distance of 21 kms.

~ C O N G R A T U L A T I O N S ~

• In other fitness news, my friend Stéphanie has joined the gym.  So proud of this step she is taking in her life.  So happy that she joined my swanky gym.  Ma belle - may you find love, peace and happiness on the inside and out regardless of where life takes you.  I am so happy and thankful to share this journey with you.
• Finally ... I am hoping that having a weekly gym routine will allow me to spend more time with my bestest of bests, Tanya.  (she doesnt have a fitness blog and the one blog she has hasnt been updated since Feb 2010 so no links here. teehee).  You would think that two people who love eachother's company and only live 10 minutes apart would see each other frequently.  That's not the case.  We are lucky if we cross paths once a month.  (her fault .. she is the one that moved to a town I never go to from a road that I take home that went right by her house.  oops .. did I type that outloud?  bahahaha.  love you!)  There are so many rewards to this that we/I have to make it happen at least once a week.  A travel buddy.  A workout buddy.  Guarenteed time with Tan.  How can I go wrong there? xox

So ... to sum up a long post:  a new biking goal, congrats to Katie & Stéphanie and more time with Tanya.  No matter which way you look at it, I am surrounded by some pretty awesome ladies that I am fortunate enough to call 'friend.'  Love you all. 

Happy health to all.

i have readerS ???

Well I for one, am gobsmacked and, I must admit, a tad excited.  I thought for sure Katie was the only one who read this blog but low and behold, my last post had comments from an anonymous read and Maranda.  Ladies ... you have NO clue the encouragement I got from your comments.  THANK  YOU.  I have been waivering on whether or not to keep this blog going but now ... maybe I will for a little while longer. 

Thank you for energizing my motivation.  It's been a rough week going back to work and adjusting mentally and physically to it along with the other struggles I am facing in life.  I know I am not alone in the journey but it is nice to see support outside the wonderful support I already have. 

Enjoy your sunday.

*** Viewer Discretion Advised ***

(this post was started on Wednesday August 31st.  It has taken me this long to actually get up the guts to publish it ... to put myself out there in my physical sense.  It is for this reason I have left it in the present tense and, come to think of it, it is actually funny since I have all of ONE reader.  why do I do this blog?)

This is me.  All of me.  The real me.  And I promise you this ... there are no other photos like it on the internet.  I can not believe I am doing this have done this.  I am very careful of what I put on websites (ie blogs. facebook, etc) because there is NO way I want anyone from my past knowing who I have become and what I look like.  I am embarrased that I look like this.  Dumbfounded how I not only let it happen, but stayed this way for all of my adult life.  Disgusted.

Today was a good day.  I started training with a personal-trainer (as soon as she gets her CPR) today and it was awesome.  She took me through a foundation strength program and I am feeling it.  I am a bit stiff ... but a good stiff.  I also did leg and arm work while I was swimming for the cardio part of my workout so that is a contributing factor I am sure.  What is even better is that my new personal trainer is also a good friend so it is a double bonus.  We now have a long standing bi-weekly workout date to touch base, track my progress and change things has needed --- and hang out and laugh and have fun.  (see ... double bonus)